i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
her facebook's as public as her vagina
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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