Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
