my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
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