I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
