Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
My feet surprised me
Randomize
