Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
