he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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