i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
