meet me or not, i'm out of control
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
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