i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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