it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Randomize
