if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
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