All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Randomize
