no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Randomize
