we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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