last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
