i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
You took a bar mat shot.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Randomize
