At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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