Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
i now understand why vodka
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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