He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
