it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
