rhymes with "ouble enetration"
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize