she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
