WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
