Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
i out mim tonsoeep
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