Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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