im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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