Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
