Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Randomize
