Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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