I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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