so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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