Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
