Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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