butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
Randomize
