Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
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