I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
