Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
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