she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
