so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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