I'm gonna have a badass scar
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
