I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
