did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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