so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
She bit a glass in half.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Randomize
