so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
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