this boner is exhausting
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
