All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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