guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
Randomize
