Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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