break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
My pussy is not your playground.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Randomize
